When news broke that the House passed the Protect Life Act, I nearly spit up the sixteen Oreos in my mouth (double-stuffed,  of course). Had Congress really taken a pro-human stance? Done something to help people? I didn’t even know they had come back from that at Chateau de Cheney – where happiness is a warm gun (yeah, yeah, I know – I have a phone call from 2006).

Anyway, back to the future and the point. As it turns out, when the House of Representatives says “protect life,” what they really mean to say is “protect my membership at the country club,” “blindly overlook the facts, simply to push a policy which puts women at risk,” oh, and “when’s lunch?” Before the act was passed, hospitals receiving Medicare or Medicaid funds were required to provide emergency care to any patient, including women suffering from life-threatening pregnancy complications, or send them to another hospital if they don’t have the proper equipment to perform needed surgeries. Under the Protect Life Act, which passed Thursday evening, hospitals that don’t want to provide abortions can refuse to do so, even for a pregnant woman in life-threatening condition where survival depended on a termination of a pregnancy. And for the hundreds of private religious hospitals across the country, this means Dr. Catholic Bishop McMan Person is getting proverbial thumbs-up from the feds to refuse to perform any emergency abortion procedure.

Ah yes, Congress. Protect life.

The act, proposed by Rep Joe Pitts (R-Pa), also prohibit women who are under the Affordable Care Act to purchase health insurance plans that cover abortion. Good work, House. Except for the fact that the majority of of health insurance plans cover abortion. And by a majority I mean more than 80 percent, according to a report done by the Guttmacher Institute.

But whatever. So the House is eliminating health insurance that might save families from bankruptcy. Yeah, the reps are making it so that hospitals can refuse a patient a procedure, even if it means death. Well, it’s not like it can get any worse for women, right?

“Not all cultures are equal.” – Michele Bachmann

Goddammit. Canada, anyone?

(Photo courtesy of sodahead.com)

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